EnviroSpin Watch

Why your kids won't get any prezzies this Christmas (unless).....

It's those damn windfarms, of course - Private Eye finds Santa in a spin: 'Cover Picture' (Private Eye, Christmas Issue, 2004).

Clearly we need Rupert Bear and his chums to come to the rescue:

From: 'Rupert and the Giant Windfarm'

"Rupert and Bill Badger take a great big saw
And hack down the giant turbines from the moor;
Their blades crash thundering to the ground,
Waking all the fairies with their sound."

"Rupert now helps Santa to his feet,
While fairies pack the toys again so neat;
The reindeer, too, they tend with care,
And soon Good Santa sweeps into the air."

"'These wind pumps are a dreadful curse,'
Says Rupert. 'And to make things worse,
It's Santa's reindeer, not only bat and bird -
They really are just too absurd!'"

"But Santa's left for them a special toy,
To thank them for returning all his joy;
Now, with their roller, 'Dibner', steaming well
They flatten every turbine on the lovely fell."

"At last the moor is free once more,
'So good to see those red kites soar.'
And Rupert tells his parents all,
How he and Bill saved Santa's dreadful fall."

And here's our very own Rupert Bear doing a grand job, as ever: 'Bellamy dismisses climate change fears' (PA News, December 20): "Television conservationist David Bellamy has dismissed claims that global warming is threatening the future of the world...."

Philip, Was there anything more comforting than a Rupert Bear Annual on a Christmas Morning a long time ago..... in Christmas Past? And 'global warming'? "Humbug!" A Merry Christmas and a ecohype-free New Year to you all!